Monday, June 15, 2015

These Are All The Ridiculous Things That Nicolas Cage Blew His Money On

Admit it, if you had the money to buy a giant dinosaur skull you would probably do it too.

Nicolas Cage was once known as one of the highest-paid actors of all time, making over $150 million between 1996 and 2011. Here’s how he managed to blow through almost all of it.

Dinosaur Skulls 
Cage outbid Leonardo DiCaprio for a 67-million-year-old Tarbosaurus skull that was valued at $300,000. This wasn’t the only dinosaur noggin he owns… I’m guessing he uses them as extremely ornate party punch bowls.

Two albino king cobras 
Some say he used them for protection, others say they were for… sexual activities.

Island in the Bahamas 
Worth $7 million, Cage bought a 40-acre island called Leaf Cay south of Nassau.

The Shah of Iran’s Lambo 
He liked the late Shah’s Lamborghini Miura SVJ so much that he bought it for $450,000 in 1997.

A haunted mansion in New Orleans Remember Madame LaLaurie from “American Horror Story: Coven?” Well, she was a real person, and a real crazy serial killer, and Cage bought the actual house that most of her crimes went down in. He doesn’t own it anymore, because as a cheesy ghost tour guide once told me, no one has owned it for more than 5 years since LaLaurie disappeared.

An octopus 
Clearly everyone should own one of these.

A crocodile 
Things are getting weirder…

A Shark 
Seriously, what do you think he was planning?

The 1st Superman comic 
Cage used to have a comic book collection worth over $1.6 million, including Action Comics #1 which was the first appearance of the Man of Steel.

Two European Castles 
Kings have one, so of course Cage had to double that. He bought an $8 million castle in Bath, and then spent millions remodeling it. Then he bought an 11th century Bavarian castle in Germany.

A pyramid tombstone 
Cage decided he wanted to be buried in the famous St. Louis Cemetery No. 1 in New Orleans, and he already has his weird unexplained tomb there ready to go. It reads, “Omni Ab Uno,” which means “Everything From One” in Latin.

Shrunken pygmy heads 
No one really knows why he spent his money on these, but he did.

Other lavish purchases included luxury yachts, 30 motorcycles, 50 cars, a private jet and 15 estate homes around the world. Eventually the party ended and he went broke, and then he owed the IRS $13 million. Hopefully he’s got a handle on things now… but you live, you buy sharks, you learn.

Maybe he should find a way to profit from the glorification of his face on the internet.

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